This tongue-in-cheek parody is a theoretical extrapolation, a glimpse of the way the whisky industry could develop. Pure fantasy or manic paranoia.
Single malt sales stagnate.
Blended malt sales explode after industry 'conversation'.
Lagavulin blended malt (50:50 with Caol Ila) grows from 100,000 cases to 500,000 cases.
Single malts become very expensive, driving down demand. Baccarat crystal decanters used.
Having disassociated the brand from the distillery with Blended Malts, redundant distilleries are shutdown.
William Grant bought by Edrington Group.
5 more distillo-factories built, smaller inefficient distillery close as production is further centralised.
Cardhu sales hit 1 million cases.
Single malts become non-existent in an increasing number of overseas markets.
Edrington absorbed by Bacardi.
Lagavulin Islay blended malt production comes from Caol Ila. Lagavulin becomes whisky heritage site.
CL Burn Stewart bought by Pernod.
Whisky laws changed: blended malt category replaced by “Scotch Whisky”
15 Single malt distilleries left in operation and 8 distillo-factories.
Cardhu Red Barrel sales, having reached 20 million cases, start to fall as consumers tire of the ubiquitous brand.
Diageo Ricard sells off whisky interests to bioethanol producer.